Using Negative Experience With People As Learning Lessons

I’ve always wondered what makes people treat others, let alone complete strangers, with such authority and ill content.  For them to feel that they have the right, or even responsibility to say something.  Are they just so unexplainably unaware of how their actions affect others?  Are they just having a bad day or are they projecting their anger and pain onto others?  The thing is, most of the time we will never know.  And no matter how much we wish we could make those people realize how much their actions are hurtful, and that there is a better way, we do not have the power to change other people.  We only have the power to change ourselves.  And change how we react to others.

My whole life I would respond to negative situations with people by becoming frozen.  I literally would freeze with fear and not be able to utter one word in my own defense.  I couldn’t stand up for myself, even though I desperately wanted to.  Instead, I would play the situation over and over again in my head, imaging what I would say or do in response.  I thought that if I was able to stand up for myself, I would not feel ashamed, and would not be filled with that negative energy that always consumed me afterwards.  As they say, ask and you shall receive, but was it what I needed?

Over time, little by little, I was able to work through this.  I recently went through one of these instances, where someone felt they could talk trash to me, a complete stranger with no rhyme or reason, and although I didn’t overreact by calling them names or start a fight, I told them exactly what I thought and walked away.  I had successfully broken out of my initial frozen state and was able to express my feelings to the other person.  I did not feel what I expected to feel afterwards though, and my spirit and soul became overwhelmed with that same negative, toxic energy.  And my mind was already trying to replay the situation over and over again, trying to still find fault in my actions.  I was upset and knew if I dealt with this situation as I’ve done with similar situations in the past, my mind would obsess about it for the next few days, and I did not want to give that person all of my power.  I believe that each obstacle in life is specifically presented to us by the Angels as an opportunity to learn and grow.  We can take our power back by seeing the lesson in the situation, and seeing what we can do differently.  In my particular situation, I realized that yes I now have the power to stand up for myself and speak my mind, but what I really want is to feel peace and calm within, no matter what anyone says or does to me.  I do not want that negativity to enter my aura and get stuck there.  And even though I had gotten what I wanted for so long, I realized it wasn’t what I really wanted after all.

I asked the Angels for guidance in helping me understand the best path to take for me keep my peace, no matter who may try to encroach upon it.  And after silencing my mind, I was able to hear the Angels wisdom and advice.  My new idea of strength is to know I have the power to stand up for myself, and yet I have the power to refrain from engaging in toxic energy.  To get where I want to go, a pacifist attitude is the path to currently walk.  Now, I still believe it is extremely important to stand up for myself, but some battles are not worth my peace.  Situations that involve individuals who are always around, like family, friends, and coworkers, then it is of the utmost importance to make sure proper boundaries are set.  I am going to respect myself enough to let others know I deserve to be treated with the respect everyone deserves.  But in cases where I’m never going to see the person again, or they do not have the awareness to understand and evolve, then I can walk away knowing its not worth my time, energy, breath, and thought.  I can still be powerful and strong, without having to prove it to others.

Trying to look at a situation from a higher perspective, can take away that pain and negativity.  It can lesson emotions so they are not so overwhelming and stop the mind from obsessing.  Finding a reason for life’s hardships can be the key to help move on and grow, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally.